It's total irony when I see that the bulk of the enthusiasm shown toward having children come from gay men as opposed to the straights, at least in my observation...and you know what? It makes sense. Maybe in the Mormon context in which I view things, this has relevance. A side-effect of the relentless cultural pressure to have children within Mormonism is that straight couples see children as an obligation rather than a treasure. Many gay men are especially deprived from cultural acceptance with having children from many angles. First, is the religious community tending to demonise them. Second, a negative association with pedophilia exists. Lastly, while many are willing to tolerate lesbians raising children, there isn't a similar tolerance toward homosexual guys. So, while many in the community choose not head down the fatherhood path, those who choose so tend to be passionate about it, most likely owing to a sense of holding dear something so elusive and universally maligned by our society.
Likewise, an evident spirituality can be seen in many gay men who choose this part of their lives (a relationship to God/Higher Power) to keep intact. To me, these guys are worthy of much respect. Once again, in the LDS context, spirituality for straight men is tied with privilege. Their rewards for spirituality are leadership positions, a hot trophy housewife (or 50, in the afterlife), and general praise within the conservative religious community. No such comparable incentives for spirituality are available for gay men, so props to them! In many ways, though, I'm not shocked. Yeah, it's a pretty gross and stereotypical generalisation, but spirituality is more within the feminine domain, and many homos are in touch with it all. In all seriousness, when I hear a gay LDS man pray (and I say this with no condescension), I hear a soul calling out to a distant god in heaven to listen to him, which is actually kinda cute. When I hear a typical/douchey straight Mormon guy (NOT ALL STRAIGHTS, BTW) pray, it seems like he's simply having a conversation with a buddy from the bowling alley who's gonna give him an ace F-150 the next morning.
1 comment:
Very interesting points. I'm inclined to think you're right about gay fatherhood and spirituality.
Post a Comment